Since becoming a parent I have blamed my increasingly frequent scatterbrained moments on my ever-present kids.
Because we live in the middle of nowhere I can only make it to the grocery store once a week in good weather and every other week in bad weather. Because I don't plan ahead to grocery shop when my husband is home I inevitably find myself having to shop for a week or two of groceries with all five boys in tow.
I always tell my husband that I'd be able to get through the store more efficiently and spend less money in it if I could go shopping without taking all the kids with me. This was my story and I was sticking to it. Until last week.
In a burst of orderly thinking, I managed to pry myself away from mountains of laundry and the children to clean my purse and get to the store. OK. The truth is I was looking for a reason to get away from the laundry. But at least I fled the Kilimanjaro of dirty clothes for something productive.
List in hand, I entered the store child-free. I made such fantastic time that I decided to tarry a bit in the health and beauty section of the store. I use the all-boy-all-the-time atmosphere that pervades our house to my advantage. I have a seriously girly love of shampoos, lotions, perfume oils, nice candles and anything else that smells wonderful and I decided to indulge myself with a little sniffing of shampoos in the store.
I picked up a pretty purple bottle of shampoo and cautiously opened the top. I'm not sure whether it's frowned on to open bottles for the purposes of smelling them. There is always some part of me that feels naughty when I do that. But wrong or right, I popped the top. I couldn't catch the scent right away so I gave a little gentle squeeze while holding the bottle closer to my nose. That gentle squeeze sent a geyser of shampoo shooting up my left nostril. I was so shocked that I moved the bottle before releasing my hold thus sending the stream of shampoo up my right nostril, onto the right lens of my glasses and all over my right cheek. The blooming bottle must have been pressurized!